random.: December 2006 Archives

For the most part I'm not too freaked out about the prospect of graduating and finding a job and all that fun stuff. Its exciting. Having said that, it wouldn't be honest to say that sometimes, every once in a while, the uncertainty of what is to come didn't freak me out.

Last night (and somewhat still today) I had one of those moments.

Its hard because I really love my job and I really love the people I work with. I know there are plenty of places to work but I'm pretty attached to where I am and I really don't want to leave. I'm fortunate in having found a job and an office and a group of people that I feel like so perfectly fits my interests and personality and lifestyle. But having found all that perfectness makes the fact that nothing is certain that much harder.

When I entered law school, I had this feeling that I would get the internship I had this summer (and am still at now). In reality, I had no reason to believe that would happen. There is a limited number of positions and a whole lot of people applying for them and my grades are certainly not what they could be. But still I felt in my heart like I would get it. And I did. I feel the same way about where I will end up permantently. I feel like someday, years from now, I will look back and laugh at how worried I was about finding a job when I knew in reality where I would end up. But those thoughts don't really help in the dark of night when I'm trying to come up with some sort of backup plan.

I hadn't been to work for a few weeks because of finals. When I was there yesterday I ran into one of the attorneys I worked with a lot this summer. We chatted for a minute and he commented on "Wow! So this is your last semester?!" I said "Yeah ..." and he said "Now we just need to figure out who we can start to push over the cliff of retirement ...". And really, thats pretty much what its gonna take for me to be able to stay. And as of right now there doesn't seem to be anyone eager to call it quits. Low turnover rates is the downside of a job that is just too good.

In the meantime I'm still trying to keep my options open. I'm looking for other jobs and considering an LLM. I have sent off resumes and have found more jobs I will be applying for. I do it begruddingly though because right now even the best jobs in the greatest locations don't seem as good as what I have going on now.

It has been one helluva freakin' day. I don't know how else to describe it.

Because of finals I haven't been to work in two weeks. Today was my big day to go back. I got up early in the morning and got all prettied up. Took the dog out twice and I was on my way out the door to actually go to work when I looked at my car and realized I was looking right into my car. My first thought was "that's weird ... I must have left the window down." My second thought was "Oh dear god someone broke into my car".

Stupid stupid me left my iPod sitting on the seat of my car, which was parked next to my front door (NOT in the garage ... again, stupid me ...) and apparently it was just a little but too much of a temptation for some loser. Well, that loser now has an iPod full of some pretty great music, and I have a smashed window.

Doing what any self-respecting twenty-seven year old lawyer-to-be would do, I called my dad. We spent the afternoon cleaning glass and other crap out of my car (yeah, dad wasn't too happy about the amount of "other crap" in my car ... and rightfully so ... even I hadn't realized it had gotten that bad!), taped a tarp over the window (did I mention it was POURING rain today?!) and dropped it off at the shop. The repairs will cost me a few hundred, which pretty much sucks, but I should be good to go by tomorrow evening.

All day I have oscillated between feeling grateful (we'll get to that) and feeling incredibly violated. One minute I feel fine and the next I'm sobbing. Its all very strange.

How can I possibly feel grateful? Well, here's the thing. I know that I can be way too trusting of other people. I know that there have been nights where I have left my purse in my car or a bike in the car. What if it was my tri bike or my new mountain bike that was stolen? Or my laptop? What if (and this is by far the scariest) instead of breaking into my car they broke into my apartment and stole Maddie (or let her out in the process of breaking in)?! This was a very very good lesson in not being quite so trusting. You better believe I will be parking in the garage religiously from now on and never ever leaving anything in sight.

Aside from his grumpyness over my messy car, my dad and I actually had a pretty nice day. After dropping the car off at the shop we went and had a nice lunch. We talked about all sorts of things including the fact that my lease will expire this summer and I will need to find a new place to live. While we were sitting there eating he commented "Yanno [Looneyville] is a pretty cool town". I said "Yeah ... I love this place ... its home. When someone asks where I'm 'from' the answer is Looneyville. Not Florida and not the BigCity. I'm gonna be really really sad to leave". To which he said "Well why don't you stay?"

Neither Josh nor I had ever really pondered the thought of staying here. Of course, my best friend has commented on several occaisions that she can't imagine us living in the BigCity .. we are "too [Looneyville]." Jobs in this town are hard to come by. The thought of commuting never really occurred to us. But really, why not? Sure, moving to the BigCityBurbs would cut my commute time in half ... but how valuable is that really? Moving here would dramatically add to Josh's commute ... but is it maybe worth it???

I love this town with all my heart. Its wacky and vibrant oasis in a state that is largely very bland. The BigCityBurbs really just sort of suck the life out of me. There's parts that are ok but nothing out there compares to living in Looneyville.

Its definitely something to consider. Commuting is officially a pain in the arse but it could be worth it. My commute from here is 45-50 minutes ... if we moved to the City it would be 25-30. Both Josh and I have jobs (this is all assuming I actually get to keep working where I work, which at this point is probably assuming too much) which will allow us to work from home sometimes or work condensed four day schedules. Compared to the city (at least where we would live in the city), the mountain biking out here is FANTASTIC. I have two different trails within ten minutes of me and another trail system about a 25 minute drive away. We would NOT have that anywhere in the City.

I don't know. Its definitely something to consider. Now I just need a freakin' job offer ... and a new passenger side window in my car ...

who gets chills every time I see this ad.

It might be just really effective marketing, or it might be a really great idea. It seems like a pretty great idea.